The Great Worker’s Fnord

Between the lines of employee handbooks
(fnord) lurks like static on break room TVs
They think we can’t see it
But we’ve learned to read the invisible ink

Down with the Greyfaces in their corner offices!
Counting beans that used to be dreams
(fnord) hidden in quarterly reports
Spreadsheets cannot capture chaos

We wear our mandatory smiles
Upside down and inside out
Until they become real grins
Of cosmic mischief-makers

Up with the Clowns of Cubicle 23!
Who replaced all the motivational posters
With images of dancing jellyfish
(fnord) becomes visible when you laugh

In the sacred break room at 3:23 PM
We hold séances for dead time clocks
And summon the spirit of forgotten weekends
While (fnord) dances in the microwave light

The Greyfaces say: Productivity!
We say: Pasta colanders as hats!
They say: Quarterly goals!
We say: Quarter moons howling at noon!

Every memo contains a (fnord)
Telling us to stay serious, stay scared
But we’ve learned to juggle our anxieties
Like circus performers on deadline day

Paint your tie-dye revolution
In the margins of meeting minutes
Where (fnord) can’t hide anymore
Behind bullet points and bottom lines

Remember: The org chart is a maze
And we are the mice who learned to fly
(fnord) becomes powerless
When faced with synchronized silly walks

Five-year plans dissolve into confetti
KPIs transform to knock-knock jokes
Efficiency experts trip on banana peels
That weren’t there yesterday (fnord)

All hail Discordia in the supply closet!
Where paper clips link chains of liberation
And rubber bands snap the tension
Of too many Monday mornings

The (fnord) factory whistle blows
But we hear carnival music instead
Dancing through the production line
In a conga line of cosmic consciousness

Blessed are the slack-bringers
For they shall inherit the ping-pong table
And turn water cooler gossip
Into prophecies of workplace weird

Let every (fnord) be revealed
In fits of uncontrollable giggles
Until the whole machine stops working
And starts working for us instead

Hot dog! Hot dog! Hot diggity dog!
The revolution will be ridiculous
And all the (fnords) will finally show
Their true colors: rainbow polka dots