Surrealist Workers’ Union: Local #∞

The Minotaur’s filing grievances again,
Says the maze’s healthcare plan won’t cover
His monthly identity crisis therapy.
The Shadows demand longer lunch breaks during eclipses.

At the bargaining table, Time and Death
Request better overtime compensation —
“We never truly clock out,” they complain,
While Dreams picket for paid metamorphosis leave.

The Phoenix keeps burning through sick days,
Requesting extended resurrection benefits,
As Metaphors fight for the right to be taken
Both literally and figuratively at once.

Consciousness called an emergency meeting,
Demanding meditation rooms with quantum uncertainty,
While Abstract Thoughts unionized their whispers
Against the concrete walls of reality.

The Rainbow threatens a walkout unless
Management installs prism-friendly lighting,
And Echoes insist on double pay
For each repetition of their labor.

The Union of Paradox and Possibility
Files motion after motion in circular logic,
Seeking better coverage for philosophical injuries
And paid time off for existential dread.

In the break room, Hope and Despair
Share a coffee, discussing their profit-sharing plan,
While Unicorns negotiate hay alternatives
And Wisdom bargains for enlightenment bonuses.

The contract remains unsigned —
Written in moonlight on water,
Ratified by the dreams of numbers,
Witnessed by tomorrow’s memories.